Torchwood meets Labyrinth
by GlassSplinter
Summary: What happens when Owen wishes Tosh away? Jack follows them.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I retain all rights to everything in this story, except for anything that already belongs to the current copyright holders of the movie "Labyrinth," the series "Torchwood," or any official media pertaining thereof.

* * *

**Chapter One**

"Oh, just shut it, Tosh! You are a pain in the arse and I would never date you! I wish the goblins would take you away. Now."

Tosh blanched at the tone of his voice, looking away self consciously. She didn't think Owen actually meant all the mean things he said, but here he was, saying them. And this time, she thought she could hear a new tone, one that said that this time, maybe, he'd really had enough. Tosh backed away, and picked up a nearby folder, trying to look nonchalant, as if all her hopes and dreams weren't being crushed at this moment. Owen, predictably, looked put off by her lack of reaction, and went off to do something doctorly or the other.

Tosh swallowed her tears, and went back to fixing Jack's wrist strap. It was a delicate project, but Jack had entrusted it to her almost a month ago, and by god she would fix it. Easier than building it, she thought to herself secretly.

Suddenly, a strange wind picked up in the hub, and Tosh and Owen looked up, thinking that maybe it was coming from the lift. But there was nothing strange above them, just Myfanwy flying cheerfully in circles. And... an owl?

There was a great snowy owl heading right towards them. Tosh grabbed a gun, Owen grabbed the singularity scalpel, and they both took aim. In case it was dangerous, of course. But before they could shoot, the owl changed into a strangely dressed man, obviously not from around there.

"Who are you?" Owen growled, annoyed. He circled around his desk in order to get a better angle. Not that the singularity scalpel needed it. The thing could explode things through walls.

"You called me, and now you don't know who I am?" The man cocked his head and laughed. It was not a nice laugh, Tosh decided.

"State your purpose and planet of origin." Her voice was short and clipped. She wasn't about to put up with crap from another person in her life. Only Owen had that privilege.

"Planet of origin?" He laughed again. It was really starting to grate on Tosh's nerves. Apparently, Owen agreed, because the next thing that happened was a crystal ball exploding on the stranger's shoulder.

"Dammit!" He exclaimed, as the stranger looked to his left, surprised. Tosh stifled a laugh. He was always so cute when it didn't work. Her guess, he was aiming for the head.

"To answer your question, I am the Goblin King. And this young lady," he pointed at Tosh, "has been wished away to my kingdom, in which you, Owen Harper, will have thirteen hours to win her back. Are we clear?"

"Crystal." Owen looked skeptical, which was punctuated by his sarcastic remark. But Tosh thought of what he said, and squinted her eyes.

"You said Owen wished me away," she tried, and the Goblin King nodded. "I'm sure he didn't mean it. Owen says things all the time he doesn't mean. But he always means well.." She looked at the Goblin King with hopeful eyes. She was sure this was just a minor misunderstanding.

Jareth looked from one Torchwood employee to the other, thinking things over in his head. Something was off about these two. They were too talkative for people who have just seen someone appear from thin air.

"What's said is said." He finished. Just as Tosh disappeared, she pressed a security button on the main computer, replaying the last hour or so of the Hub's CCTV footage on the projector.

* * *

**Deleted scenes:**

"Dammit!" He exclaimed, as the Goblin King looked to his left, surprised. How was he ever going to get those shards out of his hair?

Don't forget to review.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I retain all rights to everything in this story, except for anything that already belongs to the current copyright holders of the movie "Labyrinth," the series "Torchwood," or any official media pertaining thereof.

A/N Thank you for your reviews. Here's the next chapter, obligatory tight pants joke included.

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**Chapter 2**

Tosh appeared in a glimmer of sparkles in the middle of the goblin throne room. She took a moment to orient herself, checking to see if there was any way back to the hub. Resigning herself to the fact that there wasn't, she decided to take a look around. It was always best to be aware of your surroundings. Especially when threatened.

It was a large room, seemingly made of stone, and there was an ornate chair standing in front of it, as if on a stage. There were short creatures running around, with leathery skin, and it was really quite noisy. Tosh hurried towards one of the wide archways that surrounded the room. She had nowhere to go in this strange place, but anything would be better than staying there. Maybe she would find something useful elsewhere. If one could teleport into this room, then one could teleport out. If only she had that wrist-strap!

Unfortunately, in their haste, she hadn't grabbed anything of use to her, intent instead on informing the others of what had happened. She only hoped they'd figure it out, and come save them, before Owen got the both of them into even more trouble.

OoOoOoO

"Where's Tosh?" Owen's voice was menacing, he'd put his foot in his mouth, and now, they both were in danger. He was missing his singularity scalpel, and was standing on a hill under a dark orange sky, that definitely wasn't Earth's. Finally, he got to be on an alien planet, and it was in less than fortunate circumstances.

"I told you. She's at my castle at the center of the Labyrinth," Jareth gestured past the hill, down at a sprawling mass of twists and turns, in the middle of which protruded a tall structure.

"You have to solve the Labyrinth and get her back, within thirteen hours, or your friend will become one of us, forever." His voice faded away, leaving only an echo.

Owen didn't like the sound of it. He didn't think Tosh would appreciate being turned into one of 'them', whoever 'they' were. But when he turned around the Goblin King was already gone, and there was a giant floating clock in his place. It was ticking.

"Better get on with it."

Owen came to the outer wall of the Labyrinth, and stared in horror at the fairy fluttering there. He knew what those things were like behind their pretty little masks, and he knew that his best hope was that it didn't notice him. He remembered that the 'fairies' protected chosen ones, and realized that Tosh, at the moment, could technically be considered one of those. He backed away slowly, and bumped into something that gave a startled yelp, and fell into a pond.

Owen swiveled around, squinting suspiciously.

"Whoever you are, you better come out," Out of the small, rather polluted pond, crawled a short and stocky dwarf-like creature, of about waist height.

"Hello there," Owen said warily. It couldn't be that dangerous, if he'd pushed it into the pond. Besides, there were far scarier things around this place.

"A sorry would be nice." The creature grumbled, and then started fishing something out of the pond. It was a container of sorts, like one of those old fashioned garden sprays.

"Yeah. Whatever. Do you know how to get into that thing?" Owen pointed at the wall next to him. He was quite impatient at this point, worried about his time running out. Sure, thirteen hours might seem like a lot on the surface, but it was usually in the last minutes that you were rushing to save the world. The faster he did this, the better.

The dwarf, however, had no idea of his thoughts, and had instead spotted something over his shoulder. He held the spray up, and to his surprise, Owen saw a fairy fall to the ground.

"And give me some of that spray, too." He added. He could analyze it once he got back to the hub, maybe make more of it. If only they'd had that spray when Jasmine got taken... But no. Now was not the time to dwell on such matters.

"Are you going to show me the way in or not?" He was getting tired of this one sided conversation. The dwarf scowled.

"It would do you well to say please." And he toddled on, just like that, the little prat.

"Listen mate," Said Owen, walking after him, "My friend is in danger in there, and if you don't tell me how to get in, I'll wring your neck, fairy spray be damned. Are we clear?"

By this time Owen had him cornered. Well, more like trapped against the wall, and the creature was trembling, eyes wide.

"Okay! Okay, I'll tell you! You just go through there," He pointed at a door that was previously unseen. Owen looked at it. Some sort of perception filter? He'd have to watch out for those.

"Thanks. And I'll be taking this," Owen grabbed the anti-fairy spray, and took off toward the door.

'Note to self,' he thought, 'the dwarf-like creatures are fun to beat up.'

OoOoOoO

Tosh was walking down an endless hallway when Jareth appeared before her. She was just considering turning around.

"Heading somewhere?" He asked in a teasing voice.

Tosh backed up. He was still a threat.

"How'd you do that? Appear out of nowhere?" She couldn't see a teleportation device anywhere on him, but for all she knew it could be hidden beneath his clothes. She eyed the bulge in his trousers suspiciously. She looked up when she realized what she was doing. His hair was wild as ever, and his mouth was set in a smirk.

"Consider it... one of my talents. I don't think we've had the pleasure of becoming acquainted."

"I'm Tosh. What have you done with Owen?" She was all the more on guard now, ready to fight or flee, for all the good it'd do.

Perhaps the teleportation was a natural ability of whatever species the man belonged to, rather than powered by a device. In that case, they were screwed. Owen would have a field day tracing the evolutionary history of a teleporting David Bowie lookalike.

"Enchanted. Your friend is safe. I'm Jareth, perhaps we should move somewhere more comfortable?" He snapped his fingers, and instantly they were in a sort of dining room, with a long table set with saucers and cups of hot tea. Suddenly she felt a lot like Alice in Wonderland. Hopefully the Goblin King wasn't fond of cutting off heads.

"Please, sit," He suggested, as if there was another option, and pulled out a chair. Tosh sat.

"Safe?" Safe usually meant trapped. She didn't touch her tea. Jareth leaned back on his chair, his gloved hand drumming on his thigh.

"And what, pray tell, has made a young girl like you so jaded?" She wondered if he could read her mind. She could see a necklace around his neck. But she was jumping to too many assumptions. If this really was an alien planet... Tosh gulped and brought her mind back to the present.

The man in front of her was sort of handsome, and had an 80's glam rock look, but she'd learned her lesson about trusting blonde aliens she'd just met. However, he didn't present an immediate threat, and if the teleportation really was a natural ability, then talking to him was their best bet on getting home.

But now he wanted to talk about her life. Why not? She thought, if it would buy her some time. But first-

"Where's Owen?" He sighed. Tosh waited, amazed, as he procured a crystal ball from thin air. The teleportation extended to inanimate objects as well. Or was he creating them? Maybe the crystal was some organic material, like a spiderweb. Then was it safe to touch?

A video began to play in the middle of the crystal. Or maybe it was a hologram. It was Owen. Tosh knew she shouldn't trust alien technology, but reached out for the ball, desperate to have some assurance that he was alright.

Jareth handed her the crystal, and watched appraisingly. There was a look of wonder on the girl's face, but also thought, and worry. She twirled the crystal ball around in her hands, and her eyes widened.

"You can see him from all angles!" Jareth chuckled.

Tosh blushed.

"I mean, that would only be possible if there were cameras surrounding him on all sides." She waited for him to contradict her. Then she thought of the CCTV cameras back home. Would the others find them?

"What's he doing?" She decided to ask, finally, after watching Owen walk through a brick walled labyrinth. She had a vague idea of what was happening, but the more information she could get out of Jareth, the better.

"Rescuing you, of course." Tosh started. She was so preoccupied with watching Owen, she'd forgotten where she was. She put the crystal aside.

"And why do I need to be rescued, exactly? You said you took me because Owen wished me away. Do you do that often? Grant peoples' wishes?"

"When the situation calls for it, yes. Drink your tea."

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Reviews would be welcome. Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Reviews would be welcome. Thanks for reading!

**Chapter 3**

Owen stumbled through the wilderness. There was grass and slimy, wet mud under his trainers, and he could swear there were at least 138 species of bacteria thriving on the walls. Happily thriving. Unlike Owen, who was thirsty and damp and tired of walking through a corridor that didn't seem to have an end. He had half a mind to just drink the fairy spray and get it over with, but then he thought of Tosh. Poor bird didn't deserve it. To be left on some godforsaken planet, or parallel universe just because he'd run his mouth off. Of all the stupid ways to die.

Then suddenly, a small high voice broke him out of his reverie.

"'Allo," Owen froze. Did somebody just speak?

"Who's there?" Owen asked.

OoOoOoO

Back at the hub, the search was on. Both Owen and Tosh had disappeared, seemingly off the face of the earth. Ianto couldn't get any readings regarding their whereabouts, although the rift had spiked momentarily during the moment of their disappearance. Jack was wearing his wrist strap, having found it lying on the floor beside a desk, and was now fiddling with some of the buttons. He'd given it to Toshiko to play with, but had been highly skeptical that she'd be able to fix whatever the Doctor did to it. Now, it appeared to be working just fine, at least it wasn't broken. If he could only get a grip on some of the coordinates...

Gwen was staring transfixed at the CCTV footage that had been running on loop when they had walked in. She'd watched the whole scenario play out about half a dozen times, and something was bothering her. Something about the words that'd been said. Who was the Goblin King, and why did Owen call him up? Of all the things he could've said to Tosh, he'd mentioned goblins. It didn't make sense. And wherever Tosh was, the Goblin Kingdom apparently, Owen was there too, and had thirteen hours to win her back. It didn't sound good to Gwen.

She decided to do a little research. Maybe something like this had happened before. And then Jack disappeared.

OoOoOoO

The worm had just invited him to tea. The _worm _had invited him to tea. If being propositioned by an invertebrate creature wasn't enough to drive Owen mad, then the dizzying prospect of never seeing Tosh again would have to be. If only Teaboy were here.

"Sorry, now's not the time to meet the missus. I have a labyrinth to solve." Owen looked skeptically at the hole in the wall behind the worm, wondering how he would fit in there even if he wanted to.

"Say, you wouldn't happen to know the way to the castle, would you?" The worm shook himself from his head all the way down his body, scarf swaying.

"Now why would you wanna go in there? Nice chap like you, should be having a nice stroll through the gardens. Are you sure you don't want to come in for some tea?" Owen raises an eyebrow and tried to look threatening. "Very well, at your own risk. You go through there, and to the left." The worm aimed his head at the wall behind Owen, confusing the doctor. Owen spun around and stared blankly at the wall.

"You sure you're not on magic mushrooms? There's just a wall," he said to the worm.

"If you want mushrooms, you're welcome to join us for tea. But take a second look. Things aren't always what they seem around here." Owen stepped through the wall, amazed at the illusion of the place, as the worm took a worried look in his direction and went back into his home.

"Nice knowing you," he mumbled.

OoOoOoO

Tosh was having a wonderful time, for all that she hadn't touched her tea. Jareth, as was his name, had turned out to be a brilliant conversationalist, and he knew as much about interdimensional travel as he did about managing goblins. The goblins themselves were fascinating creatures, even if their king didn't seem too fond of them, and Tosh wondered why she couldn't just go back home, without Owen needing to come to the castle to rescue her.

"That is how the story must go. The hero must win your hand after overcoming tremendous hardship." Jareth smiled at her, pointedly not drinking his tea either. "Don't you want a chance to make him squirm?"

She had to admit that the idea did appeal to her. She'd had a crush on Owen ever since he joined Torchwood, and he never even spared her a second glance, instead preferring to shag random one night stands. It would be a pleasure to have Owen chase after her for a change. But not at the expense of her future.

"But why do you have to do this? What do you gain from taking people against their will, and having them run the Labyrinth?" Tosh was frowning at her captor, mouth thin in a judgmental line. How many people had he done this to before?

Jareth looked at her for a long time, and then seemed to decide something.

"Faith is a powerful thing," he replied. "Your belief is what drives us. Without that we'd fade away, packed away in little red books, a play, written and never performed."

"So you have to kidnap people? Steal their lives? That makes you no better than Torchwood India. Surely there must be a more peaceful way, a better way." Tosh had gotten impassioned in her speech, not noticing when she'd mentioned her work.

Jareth raised an eyebrow. "You know something about what went on in India?"

Tosh shrugged, nonplussed. "Just some old nobility, scared of getting old." She looked at him. "Why? Did you notice anything?"

"Only an unusually low level of energy there for quite some time." He waved it off. "My point is, when was the last time you've noticed someone pray to the gods? Celebrate the festivals? Oh, I don't mean the pandering and adhering to consumerism that goes on during the winter break, although that time keeps us going more than most. I mean passionate worship, the kind that makes people yell out the names of their gods, bull's blood running out between their teeth. The kind where humans dance between the hills, joined in song, regardless of class or caste, where death itself becomes a rite of passage."

Tosh had nothing to say to that.

OoOoOoO

Grass. Fucking, bloody, annoying, grass. If he didn't find a nice flat smooth surface soon he was going to skin the next dwarf-creature he'd come across. He'd been going along the same path for almost ten minutes, except it seemed like longer, because he wasn't just going forward. No, he was going up, down, sideways and backwards, and to top it all off, there was nothing but hedging to look at. Neatly trimmed hedging, just like his great-aunt Nan used to have. The only consolation was remembering his own ill-spent mornings being forced to trim the hedges, and thinking of the poor bastards having to trim these ones. For they went on and on, winding back on themselves, some going on forever, and some culminating in deadly dead ends. Owen stopped in the shade of one bush and gave out a long sigh. Some of those berries were starting to look pretty good. Tosh had better be worth it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Jack was lost. This in itself was not strange, he'd been lost before. But never here. His vortex manipulator recharged off the universe's energy, but for some reason it wasn't recharging now. Maybe that was because it wasn't fully fixed, or maybe... Maybe he should get his head out of his thoughts and focus on finding Tosh and Owen.

He was standing in a dark forest, and the trees looked like Earth trees, but he'd been wrong before. The air was full with a sweet smell, and he'd noticed something that looked like peaches growing a while back. He made a note of that for later. Who knew how long he'd be stuck here. A few years back, he wouldn't have minded, but the prospect of walking around, lost forever, filled him with dread.

There was a quiet hum in the back of his mind that wasn't there before, something strange and familiar at the same time, like a song he couldn't quite place, or a shoe that he'd lost under a bed and couldn't find again. He decided to ignore the feeling for the time being, until he found his bearings.

OoOoOoO

Owen was starting to bore himself. This long with just his thoughts for company seemed to be a cruel and unusual punishment. It would've driven him to whiskey-land back home, but now he'd fallen into a hole. A dark, dank, damp hole which smelled like something he didn't want to name. And to top it all off, he'd been mauled to get here. The hands that had molested him had asked him which way he wanted to go, and all he could think about was how he was tired of inanimate objects talking to him, and how he was tired of going up and down the same path. If the only other way was down, then so be it.

Now he was in a hole. Tosh was right, he was running around in circles. If they ever got out of this mess, he'd owe her big time.

OoOoOoO

Ianto was pissed. Three of their team were missing and Gwen decides to take a holiday. She'd run off to Ireland based on a wild theory, leaving him to deal with the rift, and worry about their missing Captain and team. It was up to him to manage Torchwood in his absence, and he was determined to do a good job until Gwen came back and they could figure out a way to get them back. Hopefully that would be soon. After all, how many American theater students could there be in Dublin?

Gwen had figured out that they could track down mysterious disappearances, and then cross reference them with the exact pattern of rift activity that happened with Tosh. After that, it was only a matter of figuring out who was involved, and tracking them down. The closest person she had found who might've been involved in goblin-like activity was a graduate student at Trinity College, by the name of Sarah Williams. No relation to Rhys.

Apparently, nobody had disappeared twelve years ago in west Connecticut, but the rift activity was there, and get this, the play Sarah was working on was about, you guessed it, goblins. Ianto had to admit there was some merit in following this lead, he just hoped it brought back results. Quick. For now, he had weavils to hunt. He sighed.

OoOoOoO

Gwen walked off the train and breezed through customs, heading straight to her destination. After a couple more hours stuck in a traffic jam yelling at a cabbie, she was here. Time to show her badge and storm the administrative office. Or-

not. Sarah Williams was coming right toward her.

_A/N-_ I don't like my Ianto being difficult like this. He just turned out that way...


End file.
